Santa Clarita — Kevin Martin, self-proclaimed “weather savant,” owner/operator of “Southern California Weather Farce,” and known harasser of the National Weather Service, was seen on local streets today yelling at a cloud and anyone who dared passed by. “I AM NOT ORLANDO BLOOM!” said Martin, apparently to the cloud.
Martin has been known to post “weather” updates on local Facebook groups, and get into arguments with people in the comments when he is wrong. He is frequently wrong. It is not entirely clear what provoked the argument between Martin and the cloud, however it is presumed the exchange was broadcast live via his website for a nominal fee.
Patrons of “Southern California Weather Farce” receive exclusive “hyperlocal weather,” for a monthly subscription fee. For an additional fee, Martin will personally call you every morning and tell you if an umbrella is required for the day, or whether those jeans make you look fat. “Platinum Level” patrons who are fleeced will receive on-demand access to live webcams in Martin’s Mothers basement, where he resides.
Reached for comment for this story, Martin threatened to sue us and then screamed at the browser tab displaying the website.