Gavin Newsom, antagonist in a Glengarry Glen Ross TV movie sequel, takes over California Governorship

Gavin Newsom, middle-aged white male, was elected to be California’s next governor in 2018 – the year of the woman. He takes over for Jerry Brown, who will assume his next position as a deputy in Mayberry.
“These are some big shoes to fill,” Newsom said to himself in the mirror, “but you got this” [dual finger-guns].

Newsom was previously Lieutenant Governor, and Mayor of San Francisco – which is doing spectacularly and has no issues such as a housing crises, homelessness, severe traffic, lack of parking, or an abundance of hipsters.

By and large, conservatives have been threatening to move to other states once he’s in office – an idle threat made on Facebook.

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