In their own words: City Council Priorities for 2019

Councilmember Weste realizing she was in front of constituents File Photo

The Santa Clarita City Council is hot out of the gate with the agenda for 2019.

Laurene Weste says she’s looking forward to ignoring the constituents in the new year. “This town has gotten so big. My assistant really is overworked, all these people asking questions. It’s too much for her.”

Cameron Smyth says his goal for 2019 is to implement a “popped collar” uniform requirement for city council. “We’ve gotten too formal,” he says, adding “[it’s] time to take it down a peg and show that we’re totally chill,” while cracking open a brewski. He also says he would like to see a larger investment in renewable energy. “We could use a solar plant, or maybe a wind farm.”

Bob Kellar hopes to agendize an item to make possession and/or usage of “Mary-Jane” eligible for the death penalty. “There’ll be no smoking dope in Santa Clarita,” Kellar said in a video statement.

Councilman Bill Miranda hopes to change the rules about endorsing products. “I just received offers from Raisin Bran and Depends, it’s a real shame I have to turn them down.”

Reached for comment by phone, Mayor Marsha McLean tried to order a pizza. Asked about Councilman Smyth’s plan for renewable energy, Mayor McLean said “Wind farm? Don’t we have enough wind already? Frankly, this town has been through enough. We need less wind.”

2 Replies to “In their own words: City Council Priorities for 2019

  1. I’m shocked your reporter missed the second part of Kellar’s comment on the topic of “Mary Jane” use in Santa Clarita, wherein he also said “Stick with booze! I prefer whiskey and vodka. Together. I love my drinky winkys!”

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